Their Success is Your Success
While this slow-and-steady process might feel at first like it’s not going to work, using coaching techniques ensures that your clients’ baked-in learning wins the race.
Hello, Talking About Money Community, how are you? (Yes, I am talking to you. 😊)
Today once again I want to discuss professional coaching, one of my favorite topics to ruminate on. Professional coaching, as described by the International Coach Federation (ICF), is
[P]artnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. Coaches honor the client as the expert in his or her life and work and believe every client is creative, resourceful, and whole.
Furthermore, the professional coach’s job is to:
Discover, clarify, and align with what the client wants to achieve
Encourage client self-discovery
Elicit client-generated solutions and strategies
Hold the client responsible and accountable
Let’s take a look at these job functions one-by-one and reflect on the professional coach’s role in the growth and development of their clients.
Discover, clarify, and align with what the client wants to achieve
What types of clients come to you for help? They might be drowning in debt or maybe they want to purchase a home (and maybe these to scenarios apply to the same person!). Maybe they want to be able to pay for their kid’s college or maybe they are wondering if they are every going to be able to retire.
Those are the presenting problems, yes, but what do they really want to achieve? Maybe it’s the satisfaction of a project well-executed. Maybe it’s peace of mind that what had been keeping them up at night finally allows them to rest. Maybe it’s the confidence of knowing that even though they haven’t memorized all the financial jargon, they can ask clarifying questions of an expert until they have a firm understanding of what they want to know.
So how are you going to know about the deep-seated emotions and motivations that you client harbors?
You are going to ask them.
During what is commonly called the “Discovery” session, your job as a professional coach is to start to uncover the “why” of why your client wants to make a change. And don’t believe that they are going to be able to articulate this sentiment on the first ask – this is why they sought out your help in the first place!
While “Discovery” is the theme of your first session with a client, don’t think that this is the last time that you and your client will discuss their “why.” Discovery starts in the first session, but it will reappear again and again.
Are you thinking that you need some tools to help give you structure to your Discovery session? Try “Your Financial Wheel of Life,” a tool that I have adapted for use in my Discovery sessions with clients.
Encourage client self-discovery/Elicit client-generated solutions and strategies
“Okay, Kimberly,” you might be saying to yourself, “If I am the so-called financial expert in this relationship, why-oh-why am I asking my clients to engage in self-discovery or generate their own solutions and strategies? Don’t I already know the solutions and strategies? Won’t it go faster if I just open their brains and dump in my knowledge?”
Ah, Grasshopper, you have come up with the best question.
And the answer in a word is: No.
Part of the magic of professional coaching is watching for those light bulb moments when your client is coming to their own solutions and strategies. This makes the learning deeper and more long-lasting. When done right you might hear your client say something like:
I never thought of that before!
Wait, I could do [fill in the blank with a strategy that you could have told them at the beginning]!
How are you going to lead your clients to these moments of epiphany when true learning happens? You are going to pull from your coaching toolbox two of your most prized resources: Active Listening and Powerful Questions.
For earlier posts on Active Listening and Powerful Questions, please take a moment and check out:
The Utter Importance of Listening
Listening to Build Bridges, Across the Aisle and Across the Table
The Question that Could Change Your Life
First, let’s spend a moment talking about Active Listening.
According to ICF, Active Listening…
Focuses on what the client is and is not saying to fully understand what is being communicated in the context of the client systems and to support client self-expression.
How could you practice active listening? Try some of these ICF-approved actions:
Consider your client’s lived experience, values, and beliefs to enhance your understanding of what your client is communicating to you
Reflect or summarize what your client just said to ensure that you understood it
Recognize and inquire when there is more to what your client is communicating (I like to ask, “What else is front of mind for you in this moment?”)
Notice, acknowledge and explore your client’s emotions, non-verbal cues or other behaviors
Integrate your client’s words, tone of voice, and body language into what you are watching to better determine the full meaning of what your client is communicating
Next, let’s turn to Powerful Questions.
Consider trying one or more of these when meeting with your client:
Ask your client about the way they think and their values, needs, wants and beliefs
Ask your client questions that help them explore beyond their current thinking
Invite your client to share more about their experience in the present moment
Invite your client to generate ideas about how they can move forward and what they are willing or able to do
Share your observations, insights and feelings, without attachment, that have the potential to create new learning for the client
Challenge your client (with their permission, or course!) as a way to evoke their awareness or insight
Hold the client responsible and accountable
I am going to ask you a question and I want you to answer honestly:
After a session with your client, how long is your list of follow-up tasks? How long is your client’s list?
While doing the bulk of the work between sessions might make you an excellent counselor (and I love and admire excellent counselors!), giving your client to opportunity to learn and grow by completing their own action items is what makes a professional coach. For ease, let’s call the breakdown of responsibility 80/20 – the client does 80%, you do 20%.
Why is it so important for your clients to conduct the bulk of the work themselves, especially when you know this stuff inside and out? For one, your clients rely on you to help them solve their financial problems and achieve their financial goals. You may be the first person in their life and their only support while they take their first steps towards financial stability. Your holding them accountable (in a caring way) supports their ongoing progress.
Second, by holding your clients accountable they will have a higher likelihood of conducting the behavior change needed for lasting success, leaving them better equipped and more confident once they walk out your door (or log off of your Zoom session).
Lastly, your clients will not be with you forever. You want them to develop the tools for lasting change that will serve them well for the rest of their lives.
Professional coaching can do this.
