Money Well Spent
Sometimes people make seemingly poor money decisions for all the right reasons.
Hello, Talking About Money Community, sending sunshine your way. 🌞
In today’s post I am going to tell you about the meet-cute of my parents, who met as grad students at Western Kentucky State University (or simply “Western,” to locals). This story also has a money angle, as you will see, so let’s get started:
It was a hot Saturday afternoon in August in the late 1960’s, and Western’s campus was quiet, weary even, under the summer sun. My dad, then a newly minted professor of economics, and his roommate, another professor, decided to pass their weekend afternoon with a leisurely game of tennis. It was too hot for anything competitive.
While they were lobbing the ball back and forth, a man they hadn’t seen before approached the tennis court. He was friendly and introduced himself as a new faculty member, preparing to start teaching in the fall semester. My dad and his roommate welcomed him to the Western professor community, and having had all the tennis that they could stand on that hot August afternoon, invited him back to their apartment for a beer.
My mom just so happened to be at Western for that summer session too. She was a newly minted elementary school teacher in Louisville, and during the prior school year her teacher friends encouraged her to join them in starting work on their master’s degree at a program offered after school let out in the afternoons. My mom, ever the joiner, thought that sounded like fun and willingly registered for the class. That class led to another, and that summer she found herself at Western taking even more classes to work towards her masters.
My mom and her friend just so happened to be living next door to my dad and his roommate.
When the guys got back to the apartment and cracked open their first beer, their new friend inquired about the two young ladies living next door. My dad and his roommate – being the nerds that they were – had never thought to speak to them other than a friendly “hello” as they were coming or going. The new friend suggested that they invite them over for a beer, and so they did.
Everyone was having a relaxed time socializing with one another when the new friend pulled my dad off to the side of the conversation. He explained that he was having some trouble in his move to campus and asked my dad if he would lend him $50 to get him through the next few weeks until classes began and he started collecting a regular paycheck.
It should be noted that for my dad, $50 was a lot of money. Having grown up on a tobacco and dairy farm, there wasn’t a lot of extra money to go around and so my dad had paid for all of his college and graduate school himself. Every penny counted, and $50 was a lot for him to part with. But at the same time, he empathized with his new friend and colleague, and wanted to smooth the path for him as he established himself on Western’s campus. He lent him the $50.
The summer wound down and the fall semester began with all the excitement and promise that a new academic year brings. After a couple of weeks and getting settled into their classes, my dad and his roommate realized that they had not seen their new friend – the one of the tennis courts and the beers – around campus. They went to the registrar’s office to track him down and see how he was settling in. But as they gave the registrar their friend’s name, the strangest thing happened:
Their friend was not listed in the faculty directory. He wasn’t a faculty member at all.
This was quite a shock to my dad and his roommate, having welcomed this man into their apartment and their community, believing with certainly that he was one of their own. It was even more of a shock to my dad, who now realized that he was out the $50, having fallen victim to a grifter of sizeable talent.
The silver lining of this scam was that this “mystery man” (as he is referred to in my family) brought my parents together on that hot and languid Saturday in August, just a bunch of grad students hanging out, drinking beers, and enjoying each other’s company.
I guess you could say that it was money well spent.
Talking About Money Friends, what do you think about my dad’s willingness to lend a complete stranger $50, money that must have been difficult to live without?
On the one hand, this money was probably meant to pay for groceries or utilities, or maybe even for gasoline so that he could go back to the farm to visit his parents.
On the other hand, my dad had a visceral understanding of what it meant to build a career as an academic, and what a long road it was to begin to see any success in his chosen vocation. He had benefitted from the kindness of others in earlier parts of his life, from his grandfather to this uncle, so he wanted to pay it forward. That was the kind of man he was.
The next time you observe a client making a seemingly bad financial decision, rather than condemn their action, ask them why they are making that choice. You might find out that it is for all the right reasons.
What do you say…?
What does it feel like when you watch another person make a seemingly faulty financial decision?
What do you think others might think when you make a decision that impacts your own financial life?
Share your thoughts with this insightful and supportive (and did I mention good-looking?) community, either in the Comments below or on LinkedIn. Thanks, stay safe, and be well.
